067: NFT actually stands for No F****n Thanks
Do we mean F*llon or F*ckin? Plus, how to make and serve chocolate milkshakes with the perfectly crushed ice with the secret chunky sugar
(SB) Howdy sweet readers, we’re back at it again. I’ve spent most of the time since we last spoke on the West Coast, soaking up the sun and being fed well by my parents. I took a couple of beautiful hikes, went to bed early, and watched enough Selling Sunset to pass the California realtor’s exam if I took it next week (JS: Not bad for a girl with no talent). But, now I’m back, and the adjustment to the realities of winter has been a little sobering. My day to day involves a lot of desk time, but I’m doing my best to punctuate those hours with at least a daily stroll in the park. I have dreams about rolling out a yoga mat soon, but they feel remote as of this writing. My cat, Mona, has been climbing into Willis’s guitar case in the evenings and I have been a little jealous; I’d like to curl up in a small, light-proof Nylon cocoon for several hours, myself.
All of my horoscopes and tarot pulls of late seem to indicate that I would be well served by leaning into positive routines and becoming more decisive about the many crossroads of my life. I have a few good routines in place — did I mention the walks already?? — but decision making feels harder than ever. So, for now this Libra will be doing her best to drink more water and dry brush in the morning. Please let me know if you’d like to discuss the value of a flat lot (with and/or without a view) in the Hollywood Hills over a brisk stroll in Prospect Park sometime.
Here’s what I’ve been eating:
This salmon, which I made on a whim after seeing a post about it on Instagram. It slapped. I did not use gluten-free bread crumbs, but you could if you bought them.
I was visiting my parents in the Bay Area last week, and ate a lot of good take out. Highlights include the dahi sev chaat at Chatpatta Corner in Fremont and rasgullas & mishti dhoi at Bongos.
We also ate a lot of delicious food at home, including biryani and more dosas than I knew what to do with. My mom is on a cooking tear after her trip to India and I benefited greatly.
(JS) *in my Gwen Stefani* Hey readers hey readers hey. I hope you’re doing whatever it takes to get through this most frigid part of January – for me, that’s indulging in a new pair of Subus (beige) and a hefty parka replete with “snorkel hood,” which is to say I’m basically suiting up in a weatherproof weighted blanket whenever I leave the house. I’ve also embraced the timer function on my rice cooker, beckoning me out of bed each morning with its sweet MIDI tunes and toasty aromas of steel cut oatmeal (doctored – depending on my mood – with a couple spoonfuls of jam and/or nut butter; savory versions are my next frontier). It’s just like our problematic fave Gwyn says: Prioritizing care and exploring change looks a little different for everyone, and there’s no wrong way to prepare – keep calm and disrupt crypto on.
A few things I’ve eaten lately:
A riff on this borsch from Olia Hercules using my Goop detox grocery leftovers (pro-tip: off-brand coconut yogurt is a pretty good sub for kefir)
A lot of kale salads, including friend of the letter Becky’s vegan caesar (occasionally not vegan with leftover roast chicken) and the Northern Spy Co. classic
Steakhouse spread for friend of the letter Viv’s birthday – shrimp cocktail, hot crab dip, wedge salads, creamed spinach, hasselback potatoes, and reverse seared New York strips with horseradish butter
So Simple: Carrot Sambharo
(SB) January is a funny month when you’re living off a fellowship payment dispensed as a lump sum at the beginning of the term. On one hand, you’re technically flush with direct deposit cash. On the other, the memory of December’s dwindling balance (and debt!) lingers on, watching over your shoulder and sternly warning you off additional-50%-off-sales. On top of this, it’s cold out, making a certain kind of fridge-clean-out cooking ever appealing.
Such was the scene when I happened upon Zaynab Issa’s easy carrot sambharo from Bon Appetit. Sambharo, which I hadn’t heard of before reading this recipe, is a Gujarati dish often made with shredded carrots, cabbage, and curry leaf tadka. Zaynab’s version, which is more akin to a masala rich quick pickle, is easy and delightful.
Begin by washing, peeling, and chopping three large carrots into matchsticks.( I used the remainder of a bag from Detox Week that had been lingering in my crisper.) Salt the carrots liberally and set them aside while heating up a little neutral oil (I used peanut) to temper some mustard seeds and curry leaves. I went heavy on the curry leaves and have no regrets. Once the mustard seeds are popping, add some tomato paste, grated garlic, and turmeric to the mixture and fry until the tomato paste has darkened and the oil is colored. Mix the paste into the carrots, which should have released a little water. Squeeze in a lemon, and stir until everything is coated. Add a little more water if your paste seems too thick.
My greedy little hands couldn’t stay away from those carrot sticks for very long, but this sambharo was best after resting for about an hour. Zaynab recommends trying the sambharo as a sandwich, and I can hardly wait to procure some crusty bread for the cause. We ate it as a side with some salmon, and again as a snack with brown rice. It’s a little bit salty, a little bit sweet, and pungent in all the best ways– I suggest you make some immediately!
GLD: Rainbow Cookies
(JS) A deeply polarizing dessert, rainbow cookies are sometimes all look and no flavor. Occasionally they might be overpowered by a heavy dose of artificial almond extract, an ingredient for which there is a time and place, but when used in excess is effectively dessert cyanide. However, a well-executed version of these cookies is easily my favorite of Italian-American treats frequently sold by weight.* I understand that suggesting you make seven layers of anything is a big ask, but I’ll gently remind you that you’re actually just preparing three distinct layers, and only one of those requires any baking. Aside from quality almond paste, the most important ingredient for these babies is time, most of which is inactive. (A decent amount of freezer space also helps.)
I followed Deb’s recipe, which she adapted from Gourmet – the tube of almond paste I bought at the coop was in fact only 7 ounces and I didn’t scale the rest of my ingredients to account for the difference. Otherwise I basically stuck to script, using Beurremont cultured butter, Guittard chocolate, and 100% natural food coloring, which probably explains my rather pastel result (next time I’d probably double the quantity or just lean into your classic chemical dyes; everything in moderation, etc.). I was tempted to zhuzh these up a bit, finishing the chocolate with flaky salt or experimenting with the marzipan (I dream of a pistachio version), but there’s something kind of unbeatable about the traditional version that held me back.
That said, a quick skim of the comment section suggests this recipe could probably be streamlined if you’re feeling lazy – one commenter suggests you can skip separating the eggs and instead blitz everything in a food processor to no ill effect. Because of the overhang on my parchment, I skipped buttering the pan between layers and lived to tell the tale. Scared by Deb’s note about disorderly cookies oozing with jam, I took the time to weigh out my apricot preserves, which reduced by nearly half after straining. My assembled and then frozen cookies sliced perfectly, though the cross sections looked alarmingly dry at first. They tasted much better after coming to room temperature, but I would perhaps be a little more generous with my jam next time around.
*Honorable mention goes to Orwasher’s for their excellent Jewish take on these Italianx classics.
USE A CONDIMENT: Jalapeño Cream Cheese
(SB) One of California’s few genuine drawbacks (aside from the fires, earthquakes, etc.) is a general dearth of good bagels. There are always rumors and rumblings of a great change afoot, a new era in bagel ubiquity at hand, a new Wise Sons satellite location that will change everything– but these tend to be limited concessions to a more structural problem (also, a direct quotation from my forthcoming dissertation). Sure, there are a few great delicatessens on the West Coast: Canter’s, Izzy’s, and Langer’s all come to mind. But, considering that roughly half the population of Los Angeles at any given time is made up of New Yorkers who have defected, it’s not a lot. (Bay Area, I’m sorry, you’re out of luck on the deli front; comfort yourself with the best Indian food outside of India.)
Growing up, my family’s go-to bagel was from Manhattan Bagel on Wilshire. While the bagels (and bialys!) are extremely respectable, the highlight for me was often the Tijuana Hot cream cheese – a product that seems to have been discontinued or renamed. Since I had an unopened tub of cream cheese in the fridge and a hankering for a taste of my youth, I attempted to recreate this beloved dish.
I began by whipping a tub of cream cheese and two jalapenos together in my little food processor. I left the seeds in one of my jalapenos but stemmed and de-seeeded the other – YMMV depending on your jalapenos and your palate. A little bit of research (and a very old photograph of a label from years past) tipped me off that the secret ingredient in my beloved spread was likely some smoked paprika; I added in enough to give my mixture a pink tinge. Craving a little more complexity after tasting, I also added in a few rings of pickled jalapenos and a few drops of canned adobo sauce.
My results were tasty, but still just a kissing cousin of the cream cheese I so loved. The fresh jalapenos loosened up the spread considerably, and I enjoyed my first few spoonfuls not on a bagel but mixed with some tuna on crackers for lunch, and then on a piece of toast with cucumbers for a snack. I think it would also go great with smoked trout or under some sliced avocado. In any case, you could do a lot worse with your cream cheese.
PERMANENT ROTATION: Sarah Jampel’s roasted radicchio and date salad with ricotta. Extremely low effort, incredibly high reward. Restaurant-y, even!
WISH LIST
(SB) I know it’s the season to clean out one’s pantry, but I have my eyes on this Maesil syrup from Maiselhood. Maisel tea? A hint of sweetness for my Korean savories? Sign me up.
(JS) I desperately want to see Jazmine Sullivan at the King’s Theater – tragically my aging fingers were not quick enough for the presale, and the tickets have since been snatched and marked up by scammers tenfold, leaving me once again feeling like Kristen Doute. I’m contemplating a one night trip to Houston, which may ultimately be cheaper with airfare and hotel.
(SB & JS) Stock up for Seollal with Banchan Box Party’s sampler box, filled with festive treats from the likes of Susan Kim, Sunny Lee, Eric Kim, and Irene Yoo, among others. All proceeds will benefit the Korean American Community Foundation.
Instagram is toxic but we’re still on it and you probably are too.